tv shows with time travel organizations/bureaus/police/agencies/whatever should have a department with instead of a tech genius eating candy, it’s a harried seamstress or fashion designer who is like
“1450 italy? does it look like I have the time to dye you wool? nO. YOU’RE GOING TO THE 1980s”
and throws shoulder pads at the hapless time agent
“I literally made three- THREE- 18th century corsets last week. You can wait until one of them gets back, or you can go sometime post-1920s, because if I have to sew one more god damn channel I will literally lose my mind.”
“Upper middle class?!?!? You told me upper class! FUCK YEAH THERE’S A DIFFERENCE!!!”
“How about kimoNO.”
“Look me in the eyes. I do not care what you want. This is the 1500s. You absolutely cannot wear trousers.”
“Another court gown?? Here’s a novel idea: go as a peasant for once in your life. Why do you do this to me? You’re fucking sadists that’s why.”
“Don’t mind me, I’ll just be up all night hand painting silk.”
“THE POLICY IS ONE MONTH’S ADVANCE NOTICE ON PRE-1900s WOMEN’S FASHION FOR A REASON, DEBRA.”
Not just the fashion either. Imagine the poor LINGUISTS. Trying to correct accents and pronunciations and slang terms we might not even have anymore, or trying to work with dead languages just so their people aren’t noticed. and occasionally a time agent with a really strong accent they can’t do anything to change, and going ‘NO! You’re mute this mission! forget it! I am not letting you go to 1100′s England sounding like that. You’ll be a dead giveaway!
and the Historians and cultural anthropologists: ‘I am NOT sending a protestant Baptist woman into the heart of 1480′s Spain. ARE YOU MAD?! They’ll be charged with heresy or witchcraft and executed within the week! Find me a damn Catholic man who knows their Mass and is passably decent in Latin! NOW!’
“No Frank, I don’t give a SHIT how much you want to be Francois the nobleman, this is 1794 FRANCE. The Reign Of Terror? Ring any bells? No? Well unless you wish to be gruesomely beheaded by a guillotine, then you are going to be Francois the candle and lamp oil seller and stop raising a damn fuss about it! I swear a doctorates in History should be standard requirements for any agent to have this job…
Published
kiragecko 